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美国文书开头不要这样写,不然被拒的就是你

美国留学网-留学须知-2018年07月08日 11:06

去美国留学,文书是一份你送给招生官的“情书”,而你能够通过申请往往也会是只因为这一纸“情书”,但是你的文书开头千万不要这样写,不然你将被刷掉。

  去美国留学,文书是一份你送给招生官的“情书”,而你能够通过申请往往也会是只因为这一纸“情书”,但是你的文书开头千万不要这样写,不然你将被刷掉。

  一、重复简历型

  I earned my Bachelor of Science degree in … Sciences with a specialization in … in 2002 at … university

  立思辰留学360点评:不要去重复简历中的东西,这在很多学校的PS要求中明确提到,个人陈述的写作要具体到事件上,事件解决上,而不要单纯重复已有的内容。

  二、学校介绍型

  I am an undergraduate in…University , the largest university anda cradle of scientific and technological talents in China.

  立思辰留学360点评:该同学的PS开头等于是一个申请学校的简介,这好像是在帮助学校做宣传,或表达你有多了解该学校,而不是写个人陈述了。这是没有意义的开头,白白浪费了字数,最容易被秒拒掉。

  三、抄袭句式型

  As a student majoring in Computer Science, I began my odyssey since I entered undergraduate program. Indeed, having entered this splendid computer world, I am more than greedy for something new.

  立思辰留学360点评:Odyssey 和more than greedy for something new 这种句式不知道是从哪里学到的,很多同学在用。但你要知道,老外最恨抄袭,最喜原创,所以利害关系大家想想吧。

  四、救世主型

  I am a problem solver. I have an impulse as a kind of instincts to solvevarious problems before me and enjoy doing that. Since I was a little boy, a voice from President Franklin Roosevelt has constantly hovered around my mind, “The world can be changed by man‘s endeavor, …

  立思辰留学360点评:一副救世主的形象,小时候就受富兰克林的影响,立志改变世界。PS的写作一定要个人化具体化,别吹牛,甚至带着一种霸权主义思维。

  五、犹抱琵琶型

  Making a right decision at the right time is very important for a young people .At present, I have come to a critical point in my life when I have to make a decision concerning my future course of action. Only a perceptive understanding of oneself will enable one to chart his proper action. Aftercarefully thinking, reviewing my life and analyzing my personality, I make the determination and choose to apply for graduate study in XXX. And I choose to specialize in communications which I will pursue a lifelong career.

  立思辰留学360点评:重点放在自己要做重大决定上了,人生的转折点,然后来上句所谓名言警句,这是浪费字数。在有限的字数里,同学们应该学会直接,并且抓住重点,突出自己最有优势的方面,最有特色的方面。

  六、忆童年型

  “Why the gecko can climb on the wall while we can’t-”“Why the leaves turn red in autumn”How many stars are there in the sky-‘ When I was in childhood,I always kept asking my mom all kinds of questions。I am especially interested in how things work, I can even take apart things for several hours in order to find out its principle.

  立思辰留学360点评:上来就回忆童年少年自己如何有着远大抱负,who cares?个人陈述字数有限,却用这么多话描述童年,没有任何意义。学校想知道你如何看待未来,而不是如何度过过去。

  以上这些仅供各位同学们参考,积累一些经验,对于文书的写作大家还是要多多范文,多总结经验,不要老是埋头自己写。大家若还有其他问题,欢迎和我们立思辰留学360联系。

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